A WOMAN'S VIEW ~ Lenore Buth

Tired of the "Same Old, Same Old" Day After Day?

Maybe it's just me, but I sometimes feel ho-hum about life, even without specific complaints. How about you?

Perking up would not be hard, that is, if I got serious and dug in.  

But within a week or so I always sink back into my comfortable rut and life goes on as before.

    (Sigh.)

Then a simple way to make big changes dropped into my lap

One January Sunday our pastor surprised us all. After ending his sermon he asked the ushers to pass out the blank index cards he'd given them earlier, one for each person present.

Then he said, "It's time we all set priorities for the year ahead. But don't worry, I'll keep it simple.

"First number your cards, 1, 2, 3, no more. Then in 15 words or less write not what you hope will happen or what you want to happen, but what you will do to make this a better year. Use action words so you can remember. Got it? Okay, you have five minutes. Go!"

 About minute four, I scribbled:

1. See the good
2. Speak the good
3. Do the good

(Yes, I know that's not good grammar.)

When the timer beeped he said, "Stop! Take your card home and tape it up at eye level where you can't help seeing it. Then whenever you see that card, read your words aloud and ask God's help to carry them out.

"Now let's pray: Lord, we cannot change on our own. Inspire each of us to put into action what you just planted in our minds. Make us faithful and bless our efforts, we pray. Amen."

Later that day I taped my card on "my side" of our bathroom wall mirror, all the while thinking, End of story, I'll bet. 

Or maybe not

I decided to at least try, so over the next weeks every time I looked in the mirror I read my words again and prayed, "Lord, help me, please."

I didn't expect much, but God surprised me. I could not shake those words. I heard them when another driver took the parking space I just spotted.

Would I fuss and fume or would I see the good? After all, I had a few minutes to spare and a car to drive, thank God. Another parking place would open up, so why get bent out of shape?

Those ten words drummed in my mind with relationships, too, as when my friend forgot we had arranged to meet for coffee and good talk. 

When she called to apologize I could play the victim or I could see the good (she simply forgot.) I could speak the good ("Oh, it's all right. I know you have a lot on your mind right now.") I could do the good by setting another time to meet and telling her how much our friendship meant to me. 

I found those simple phrases even affected chance encounters, as when a clerk seemed snippy.

I could walk out angry, muttering my frustration. Or I could see the good, understanding the clerk might be distracted because of serious personal issues. I could do the good by smiling and speak the good by thanking her for her help.

I left that card on the mirror all year because it reminded me how I wanted to live my life.

And little by little, with God's help, I did change.

Here we are with fresh new calendars for a fresh new year. How will we choose to live it? 

Each of us will carry different burdens as we journey on and tough times may arise, but we are never alone. When we trust in Jesus He  promises to be with us, every moment of every day. 

This year I want to remember words of strength like these:

• Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.  --1 Peter 5:7
  
• So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.  --Isaiah 41:10
  
• I can do everything through him who gives me strength. --Philippians 4:13

Why not try my simple "formula" for yourself?

I'm no expert, but I pass on this "off the cuff" formula for one reason only. I know it can work if we take it to heart. (And I'm considering this a reminder/refresher for myself, too.)

1. See the good
2. Speak the good
3. Do the good

Wishing you all the best, dear readers, as we keep learning and growing together, 

Lenore

Are you longing for Christmas joy? Find it here

One unforgettable Sunday morning in church we sat right behind pure joy

The worship theme for the day was "Joy!" and a little girl in the row ahead of us showed us what joy looks like.

She looked much like the girl in the photo as she swayed back and forth in her polka dot dress, keeping time to the music of the worship team. 

She kept smiling up at her parents and her smile lit up her face. That adorable 5-year old was lost in praise and joy.

All of us around her were smiling, too. As always, we sang the praise songs, but with (ahem) more restraint. Blame it on being all grown-up and "sensible". Experienced. Seasoned by life.

(But wouldn't it be wonderful to feel such joy every day of the week?)

Are you feeling life is one dreary round of duty after another?  

We all could use a fresh infusion of joy, especially this time of year, when dark is long and daylight is short.

Still, we short-circuit that possibility by our December routines:

• Impossible schedules, with Christmas programs and parties and gatherings all converging on a few dates
• Never enough time
• Never enough sleep
• Dithering over what to have for the eat-too-much family dinner. Or if out-of-town family is visiting over Christmas, will we be hosting? And how much food will we need to prepare?
• Tensions over wanting to give gifts that light up our loved ones' eyes while trying to stick to the family budget

It's time to ask ourselves what really matters?

Many of us are scurrying around, reciting to ourselves, "I-gotta-remember-to- ..." Suppose we stopped for awhile and breathed in God's strength.

It helps to refocus our thoughts and fill our minds with what He says to us:

Be still, and know that I am God.  -Psalm 46:10

Let the peace of God rule in your hearts.  -Colossians 3:15 

In quietness and trust is your strength.  -Isaiah 30:15

These verses can become the music in our minds that drowns out the din and emptiness of commercialism.

Always, we have a choice of what we let take root in our minds. 

Remember the reason for the season

If we look back at our lives, what stands out are the people and the love. 

That's true for our children, too. Right now we can be laying down treasure in their memory banks and their hearts. Let's make it the real thing, like celebrating the birth of the Christ Child together and nestling into the warmth and love of family.

If we're preoccupied with the tinsel of cramming in all the "stuff" of the holidays we'll miss out on what really matters and they will, too. Our calmness and gentleness will help quiet our children and give them a pattern for how to live.

Joy comes from within, remember?

Jesus is the reason for the season

The angels proclaimed JOY to all the world the night Jesus was born. Remember?

That night there were shepherds staying in the fields nearby, guarding their flocks of sheep. Suddenly, an angel of the Lord appeared among them, and the radiance of the Lord’s glory surrounded them. They were terrified, but the angel reassured them. “Don’t be afraid!” he said. “I bring you good news that will bring great joy to all people."     --Luke 2:8-10

Joy to you and joy to me.

The same joy that bubbled up in that little girl and spilled over onto the world around her.

Joy to the highest of the high and the lowest of the low

We may assume those shepherds had it easy, lolling around on picturesque green hills while their gentle sheep grazed peacefully. All they had to do was keep an eye on them.   

Not true. If you've spent any time around sheep you know they're easily spooked and will run mindlessly after the first sheep that starts running. 

Add in possible predators that lurk in the shadows, waiting. In 1 Samuel 17 young David tells of a shepherd's life:

“I have been taking care of my father’s sheep and goats,” he said. “When a lion or a bear comes to steal a lamb from the flock, I go after it with a club and rescue the lamb from its mouth. If the animal turns on me, I catch it by the jaw and club it to death." 

Doesn't sound too idyllic, does it?

Every day those shepherds dealt with life and death--and they got no respect from the world. They lived with their sheep and probably smelled like them, too, coming back to their villages badly in need of soap and water and a haircut. 

Yet they were the first to see and worship Jesus, except Mary and Joseph.

Whatever our difficulties, Jesus brings joy

Christians are not immune from troubles and trials, but we're never on our own.

The Apostle Peter wrote about that in 1 Peter 1. He describes how Jesus brings us joy, here from the New Living Translation, verses 8-9:

You love him even though you have never seen him. Though you do not see him, you trust him; and even now you are happy with a glorious, inexpressible joy. Your reward for trusting him will be the salvation of your souls.

That's our reason for joy and for praise, for swaying with the music of our lives. Through whatever comes, we know Jesus is with us.

That joy can be yours.

If you're still wondering what you think about God, find a Bible and look up the Gospel of John. Read John 3:16 and think on it awhile. Ponder that the word "whoever" includes you.

You can read the familiar Christmas story in Luke, chapter 2.

JOY to you, my friends, in the dark and in the light, at Christmas and all year through!

Lenore

Can We Give Thanks Even When Life Is Hard?

It's that time again. Time to think and to thank

Time to count up all the reasons we have to be thankful.

Even now. Even though. Even if our personal story is full of pain.  

Like one young man I read about. I only have a few sentences of fact about his brief encounter with a friend, but here's how I imagine it have gone.  

"Joel" suffered a freak accident that shattered his life in an instant. This once-strapping young man became a paraplegic for life. 

When his best friend since childhood, "Kev," saw him for the first time he tried not to stare as he took in the finality of his buddy's situation. Joel would never walk again. 

Then Kev heard himself blurt, "Isn't it strange how one day can color a whole life?" 

"Yeah," Joel said and nodded. A moment later he flashed his old smile and said, "But I thank God that I still get to choose the colors."

So do you and I. Thanks-living is a matter of the mind and heart. Our every-day attitude.

Once we plug in that perspective it changes our view of life. And us. We stop bemoaning what's missing and start being glad for what is.  

It helps to think about that original Thanksgiving   

Start with The Mayflower. Forget modern ocean liners. This merchant ship measured only 64 feet long, about the distance from a baseball pitcher's mound to home plate. It traversed the Atlantic at a sizzling two miles an hour.  

Those 102 Pilgrims were packed into the cargo hold, an area about half the size of a basketball court. Ceilings measured less than five feet high. Their group included 18 married couples and their children. Two wives were pregnant and one delivered her baby during the voyage.

For 66 days and nights they endured limited space, little privacy, poor ventilation and scanty meals because they feared running out of food..

At last, on November 11, 1620, the captain spotted Cape Cod and dropped anchor offshore in the New World.  

No inns with warm rooms and cushy beds awaited them

They had only The Mayflower to provide shelter from the endless unknown that stretched before them when they looked toward land. Fear stalked them but they dare not give in. 

Because The Mayflower would sail back to England in spring, the men had no choice but to row to shore every day, whatever the weather. There they worked together to build basic shelter for their group, as well as for the chickens and pigs they brought with them.   

They dug graves, too. Lots of them. By that first Thanksgiving only 50 of the 102 Pilgrims who left England remained alive. Only three of the 18 married couples still had both spouses.  

Let that sink in. Imagine their heavy hearts as the survivors gathered to  celebrated their first harvest. They resolved to set aside their grief and together, thank God, the Giver. 

He gives strength to the weary, and to him who lacks might, He increases power.  Isaiah 40:29

Do we have what it takes to do the same?

Not one of us has or will have a perfect life. You and I, too, survive because God enables us to keep breathing and gives strength for each day.

Let's be on the alert for the good in life and be ready to acknowledge it. In people. In family members. It's always there, even in hard times. 

In every situation we still get to choose our outlook and to speak the good word. No eloquence required, just the doing.

Therefore, encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.  1 Thessalonians 5:11  

Let's share our lessons learned

Some of us never speak of our mistakes, as if we've skated along through life with never a rough spot. This may protect our egos, but it cheats our children and grandchildren.

We can bless them by gently telling stories about our ups and downs and lessons learned--and how God brought us through. Were there times we "feasted" on Spam because we couldn't afford turkey? Pass on such tales, if only to show it's possible to rejoice and to laugh, even when life's not perfect.  

Most importantly, as we share our stories, let's point to the Giver. 

Oh give thanks to the Lord, for he is good, for his steadfast love endures forever!   Psalm 107:1

When we thank God it reminds us we're not alone--and we never were

Neither were the Pilgrims. Like us, they anguished over their pain and their losses, but they didn't camp there. They chose instead to focus on God's faithfulness through it all. 

Can't we do the same?

Start with "ordinary" things like the myriad colors in trees and plants and flowers. We take all that for granted, but what if our Creator had colored all of Nature in shades of grey?

For each of us, if we truly take in what we see around us we'll understand why we can be thankful and can praise God.

Even when life disappoints us and sadness won't lift. Even when time drags on and we can't see an end to the waiting. Even then. 

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.  John 3:16

Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him, rooted and built up in him and established in the faith, just as you were taught, abounding in thanksgiving.  Colossians 2:6-7 

Every day, let's hone in on the joy of what is, rather than to waste time yearning for "perfect."

And let's remember that you and I "choose the colors" of our lives, too, every single day.

Thanking God for you, dear unseen friend!

Lenore

Found! A Simple Way to Improve Your Mood

Let me pass on a lesson I learned along the way--and isn't that the way we all learn?   

I'm making progress because awhile back a new friend said, "You always wear the hint of a  smile. What's your secret?"

I thanked her for that delightful compliment, of course. Right then I couldn't come up with anything better than a glib "Well, I guess I have a lot to smile about." 

Later on an incident from years ago popped into my head and suddenly I knew the answer to that question.

It sounds strange, but sometimes big truth comes from unlikely sources.

On that ordinary, life-changing day I was so completely focused on my list I didn't really look at the other shoppers milling around me

That is, not until one of them stopped me by tapping me on the shoulder. The tiny elderly lady looked concerned as she said, "'Excuse me, Honey, but you look so sad I had to stop. Is there anything I can do for you?"

Sad? Me? Baffled, I said something like, "I'm sorry, ma'am, but what do you mean?"

"Well, judging by the expression on your face, I figure you must be dealing with something really heavy. I'm so sorry! Just wanted to tell you things hardly ever are as bad as they seem. So cheer up, Dearie, and never, ever  give up hope!" 

With that she smiled again, then patted my shoulder and scurried away.   

I stood there speechless

All I could think was, what on earth was she talking about?

A few steps later I ran into my reflection on a mirrored pillar near me and took a hard look. I did look, well, grim. As much as I hated to admit it to myself that little lady wasn't exaggerating.

I heard her words in my mind for days. So did the question that refused to be stilled: What do I communicate to others around me?

Always before I thought of myself as a happy person. Now I couldn't escape the obvious: That's probably not the message the people around me picked up. 

What could I do? 

I decided to start with the way I deliberately set my lips, even when I was alone.  

Just as importantly I would pay attention to the words coming out of my mouth. 

Now I had a plan. From that moment on I would 

• wear a happy expression
• look for the good and
• speak encouragement.

I soon decided that wouldn't matter unless I lived it. If I wanted this to become a habit, my new behavior had to be all day, every day.

So I paid careful attention to the expression I wore. To my surprise, before long I didn't need to remind myself so often.  

I also concentrated on looking for and speaking the good. Soon that became more routine, too--but I still have to watch myself.

Always, always it's easier to sink into a down mood than to stay in an up mood.

Nothing changed, but everything changed

Before long I realized I was more fun to be around, even for myself. My same old, same old life felt happier, too.

Could it be this simple?

All I know is that old song holds some real meaning:  

"Put on a happy face...and you will be happy, too." 

It's not the whole truth, for sure, but it's a beginning. 

Like that tiresome saying, you can't journey a thousand miles if you never take that first step.

Looking for Bible backup?

For me, "thinking good thoughts" won't keep me going for long. Here's one specific verse that speaks to the subject. 

A glad heart makes a cheerful face, but by sorrow of heart the spirit is crushed.  -Proverbs 15:

There's more, of course. Whatever our situation, we Christians always have reason to smile. 

For God so loved the world that He gave His only Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have eternal life.  -John 3:16

But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.  -Romans 5:8

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him.  -Romans 15:13

With love and prayers,

Lenore

How Do We Get Through This Troubling Time?

We've all lived it. Times when we felt numb and hopeless, for whatever reason.  

Right now some of us might blame it on taking in too much of what's going on around us in connection with the 2024 U.S. elections.

Angry talk, accusations and division fill the air--and every kind of media or social platform we turn to. Even friends and family members walk on eggs around each other, afraid to voice their opinions out loud.

It's fair to say it often looks and sounds more like we are the Divided States of America.

What happened to national unity?

From the beginning every American schoolkid heard over and over that the United States was the great melting pot. This was the one place on earth where it didn't matter what your name was or how much money you had. Whether you were born here or in another country and arrived via legal immigration.  

No wonder the national mindset could be summed up like this:   

We are Americans! We are one! 

Also in that time everyone understood the truth of what we still say today: "Nobody's perfect."

Hardly anyone argued with that, being well-acquainted with their own repeated failures to keep their good resolutions.   

As one old-timer put it, "Ain't no perfect people anywhere. Anytime."

Let's get our brains in gear  

Let's set aside the charges and counter-charges for a moment and focus on some unique, foundational truths about our Nation:    

1. We the citizens have the right to vote and elect our President, Vice President, Senators and Representatives and other governing officials. 
   
   
2. We have the right to complain about those we elect at the National, State or local level of Government without fear of being dragged off to a work camp. 
   
   
3. We have the right to work for any employer who will hire us. Own any car we can afford. Live in any house we can pay for. In any State we choose.
   
   
4. We are free to form our own opinions. Every single one of us, agree or disagree. Free to worship God--or remain skeptical.

This is rare. Shouldn't that fact give us the right to be proud of these United States of America?

Is America perfect? Not by a long shot. Is America more good than bad? Yes

If we focus only on the flaws in our society and in people and in our world, we cheat ourselves, our families and the people in our lives. There is so much more. 

Like most Christians, I believe God put you and me right where we are, among the people in our lives. Why? Only He knows the full story. What if His purpose is so we can speak what is true and be a blessing? Here. Now.

As someone has said, if we're alive and breathing it's a sign that God still has a purpose for us. A reason to go on.

What can one person do? 

Those of us who are Christians believe we are to pray for all those who are in authority, that they would have--or at least exercise--integrity and good judgment. 

We all can pray that truth will prevail, in government, in education at every level, and in the hearts and minds of the people of this Nation.  

Just as importantly, let's remind ourselves that ultimately, freedom is a matter of the heart and mind. As a Christian I believe this verse points the way:

[Jesus said] "So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed."  John 8:36  

For all of us, as clear-thinking adults, let's not get caught up in what is divisive. Rather, may we focus on what is good and right and true.

That does not mean constantly barging into conversations in an effort to ensure our opinions dominate. Rather, we are to be gentle and kind in our conversations with friends, coworkers and family members. 

We cannot bring peace in the world all by ourselves, but we can be up-builders in the place where God has planted us.

NOW is the time!

If you have not registered to vote, do it NOW because the deadlines are upon us.

I implore you that between now and November 5 you would weigh the evidence and evaluate each candidate. Make up your own mind. Then be sure that you cast your vote--for your well-considered choices. Follow the instructions in your State, but get that vote in--and be sure it gets counted.

Let's not waste our privilege as citizens of this much-blessed Nation. 

Humbly and lovingly,

Lenore 

Can we still speak hope when the unthinkable happens?

When a large part of our inner sense of security crumbles--as it did after 9/11, what are we to do? 

Or when a family or relationship problem shakes our personal world to the core?

How do we cope? What do we tell our kids?

We may feel a gaping emptiness inside and long for comfort for ourselves, but feel we have nowhere to turn.    

Even in the day-to-day of life we may have people we care about who regularly (and more so in a crisis) look to us for reassurance and for clues on how to deal with life. 

All the while we may be thinking, I have nothing left to give.  

That's when we do what moms and wives--and dads and husbands--have done since the beginning of time. We give anyway. 

We take our thoughts off what was lost and focus on what is left.

Although we feel drained dry, still we can speak the hope that comes from beyond ourselves. Hope that's based on more than what we see and think and feel. Based on faith in God and the deep-down conviction that when we trust in Jesus as our Savior, "hope" becomes 100 percent guaranteed certainty.

That's because it rests in the One who promised to be with us, no matter what, no matter where and to be our strength, even when we have none left within ourselves.

How do we protect our children in this scary world?

We can't, not really. We can hold their hands so tightly it cuts off their circulation and follow them around like bird dogs, but there's no way to absolutely ensure they will never hurt, never be disappointed.

We watch over them, of course. We hug them and comfort them and speak the love we feel because nobody ever gets too much love and encouragement.

Through it all, good times or not-so-good, every day we commit our loved ones to God's protection, asking Him to watch over them.

How do we model living in faith?

I used to think at some point I would arrive at a more, um, exalted state of being. That I would somehow "graduate," that is, to be always at peace.  

Perhaps you've wished and prayed for that, too. Let's face the (humbling) truth: We are human beings living with never-ending announcements of yet another reason to feel shaky. That's the world we live in, yet we need not cringe in fear. 

My help comes from the LORD, who made the heavens and the earth! He will not let you stumble and fall; the one who watches over you will not sleep.  Psalm 121:2-3  NLT

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.   Jeremiah 29:11

Come to think of it, isn't that more than enough?

Always, there is help available and it's as close as our nearest Bible.

I've found when I'm running on "empty," the best way to recharge and refuel is to spend time in the Word and in prayer.

Sounds good, but where do I start?

Answers may vary--and that's okay, because each of us is an individual. Like many others, I find it helpful to mark Bible verses so I can find them more easily. 

Verses like these, which I've had marked in my Bible for years:

God is my refuge and strength, an ever present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the sea . . . The LORD Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress.      Psalm 46:1, 11

The LORD gives strength to his people; the LORD blesses his people with peace.   Psalm 29:11

The LORD is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you.    Psalm 9:9-10

Living in the world

You and I can't stop the evil in the world--and yes, there is evil in the world. Every year the 9/11 remembrances proves the point.  

It didn't stop with 9/11--and it won't. Ever since Eden, the power of Satan--evil--is with us. 

Evil will always keep trying, but it will never win. In Jesus, the battle is already won. 

Our best strategy for survival--for enduring--is to stay planted in the Lord and keep filling our minds with truths from God's written Word. 

Then when our loved ones turn to us, we'll be ready with love and with strength that comes from the Lord, who will never turn away from us.

My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth.   Psalm 121:2  

Whatever the disaster, little or large, in Jesus Christ we find the strength and stability to not only make it through, but also to speak peace and hope to those around us.

All this comes not because of who we are or because of our great internal spiritual resources, but always, only because of the One who lives within us.

Trusting, too,

Lenore