I keep forgetting it makes no sense to ask a question when I know--and may not like--the answer. Like when I put on an outfit I'm not sure about, then ask my husband, "What do you think? Does this work?"
What's the poor guy supposed to say? He knows by experience if he answers, "Yes," I probably won't believe him, because I wouldn't ask unless I had doubts. If he says, "No," I may respond, "What's wrong with it?"
Ever been there? The funniest tale I heard was of the wife who got all gussied up, then asked her husband, "How do I look?"
He took in all her grandeur and said, lovingly, "Honey, you look as good as you've ever looked."
She stared at him a second or two, put her hands on her hips and asked, "So what do you mean by that?"
Every husband would be as baffled as that one. Every wife would understand perfectly.
Bob and I have been married a lotta years by now. You might imagine that guarantees we never misunderstand each other. I hate to blast away that lovely illusion, but it ain't a-gonna happen.
In any marriage.
Ever.
How could it, since marriage joins one imperfect man and one imperfect woman? That state of being will never change, whether you've been married five months or seventy-five years.
One thing we've learned over the years: It helps to keep that in mind, especially about ourselves. It also helps to laugh, but even more to decide to laugh ... and to overlook the small annoyances and frustrations that inevitably come up between any two people. The apostle Paul puts it this way:
"Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you." --Colossians 3:13
That principle reminds us who we are and how we want to live together. Sometimes we slip up, like any two marriage partners, but when we remember it, we're both happier. Just wanting to builds strength into our marriage relationship, and into each of us as individuals. Take it from Bob and me, it helps put joy into the journey.
Happy traveling!
Lenore
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