This time of year most older high-schoolers--and their parents--are tied up in knots about what comes next.
Everyone wants to make the absolutely right choice.
College graduates are tense, too, looking for the absolutely perfect job.
That could be a long wait.
Recent graduates often feel dumped out in a world that's nothing like the dream they bought with their student loans. Some resign themselves to any job they can get that includes a regular paycheck. Others keep chasing their ideal.
Life is hard. How many of us tell our kids that beforehand?
1. Tell your kids the truth
One columnist noted that today's graduates grew up with parents who continually asked, "How does that make you feel, Honey?"
No wonder the world of employment offers a rude shock. Bosses seldom ask, "How do you feel about that?"
Employers want employees to show up on time, stay until quitting time and get the job done well and on schedule. They concentrate on the bottom line because unless their business turns a profit, there's no money to stay in business.
Or issue paychecks.
We do our kids no favor when we groom them to expect life should feel cozy and warm, like a mommy's hug.
2. Be a true friend to your children
A good friend speaks truth, even when we don't want to hear it. Our children deserve the same from us.
Sooner or later, most of us learn the no-nonsense foundation for success along the way. In school, in the job world, or even in our personal lives, here's the formula:
W-O-R-K.
Sounds hopelessly outdated, doesn't it?
That's especially true after hearing commencement speakers--and parents--who so often tell young people, "Follow your bliss! Live for your dreams! Refuse to settle for less than what makes you happy!"
Then someone will bring up Facebook founder, Mark Zuckerberg, who became a billionaire at age twenty-seven.
Reality check: How many Mark Zuckerbergs do you know personally?
3. Plant good seeds, so your kids can harvest good fruit
Love your children enough to speak lasting truth. Even in a dream job, they will have to prove themselves.
Most employees start at the bottom. It will be a slow climb from there.
They will not like parts of it. Guaranteed. Life is hard, remember? This is what hard looks like.
A runner talked of training for a track meet. "Runners know you must keep your eyes on your goal. If you waver and look down at the track your energy goes to what's under your feet and you'll lose the race."
To build a strong career, marriage or family we can't allow small annoyances to get us down. We need to fasten on what's good and let the other stuff go.
4. Nail it home that a good life does not depend on having every dream come true
Give your children a lasting gift. Tell them nobody has everything they want or everything as they want it to be.
Help them understand that individuals who expect that or insist upon it set themselves up for lasting discontent.
Wealth and achievements can never fill our inner emptiness because there will never be enough of either.
Happiness and satisfaction stem from how we look at life and from thanking God for our blessings.
A grateful spirit is a contented spirit.
5. Remember to pass on eternal truths
Be sure your children learn about Jesus Christ, our Savior. Worship together as a family and cultivate friendships with other Christian families.
Faith is the real key to a fulfilling life and peace within.
The LORD gives strength to his people; the LORD blesses his people with peace. --Psalm 29:11
Jesus said:
"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." --Matthew 6:33
Life in the real world is unpredictable and the only solid Rock is Jesus.
What we're talking about is helping our kids take on life without life getting the best of them. We moms and dads do that all along, little by little as we encourage them to keep trying and try again and to keep going. And we dole out love and hugs every chance we get.
Parenting is a process that goes on as long as we live, even though it changes form over the years.
Call it what it is: Privilege. Blessing. Joy.
Thanking God, too,
Lenore
