Life is a continuous learning channel, have you noticed?
By now I know that some "little" things can make big changes in our lives. Here are three:
1. Get real.
2. Get focused.
3. Get thankful.
Curious? Read on.
1. Get real
My husband is great, truly. That doesn't mean we're always on the same wave length. Or that we never talk past each other.
Take the day I gave one of those "poor little me" remarks and he replied, "You're only disappointed because you expected me to do that and I didn't. But you never asked or even hinted. How was I supposed to know what you wanted?"
After I got over being annoyed I realized my practical guy was right. Like many women I value spontaneous gestures and like most men, he's not wired that way.
Common sense tells me flowery gestures come cheap--and can be empty. A marriage thrives on honesty, faithfulness and loving through whatever comes. My husband lives that, so I know I'm blessed. I wouldn't trade him for anything.
Getting real means steering clear of comparisons and if onlys, too. It helps to watch out for distractions like TV shows and social media, because they can be enticing traps. We look at our imperfect lives and get depressed.
We forget that we see only what they want us to see.
2. Get focused
Whether we realize it or not, we constantly telegraph messages by what we focus on.
I saw that played out at lunchtime one day. At the next table a dad and his little girl, maybe four years old, were having lunch. Throughout their meal Daddy talked with his daughter and she talked back, with lots of smiles and giggles. He picked her up when they finished and she buried her face in his neck.
All around them sat other couples and other families with everyone engrossed in their smart phones or electronic gadgets and grabbing bites. Nobody talked to anybody, at least not any live person sitting at the same table.
The contrast was painful. Even more, one focus built family strength and love. The other satisfied a moment's curiosity.
This is important because what we focus on also dictates our moods and how we view our lives.
3. Get thankful
I've learned it makes a huge difference in my day if I start by thanking God for what is and ask His strength and blessing for the day.
At bedtime I wrap up the day by thanking Him for the good stuff and saying a simple, "Thank you," to the Giver. Then I commit people I'm concerned about and whatever happens to trouble me to God. Most of the time that helps me drift off to sleep with a smile.
As usual, the Apostle Paul sums it up, in Philippians 4:8:
Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.
Once we fix our thoughts on what's real and what's right in our lives and the people we love, living happily comes natural. Instead of scowling at what's wrong with the world we can fasten on God's goodness and smile.
(Besides, they say smiling helps stave off wrinkles.)
Still learning,
Lenore
