A WOMAN'S VIEW ~ Lenore Buth

Put joy into your days

What does it take to make you laugh?

Somehow it's much easier to be amused by another person's predicament than our own, isn't it?  

Think about it. Did you laugh ...  

At that meeting where you went on and on about a favorite topic and everyone clapped, but then someone brought up points that destroyed your argument?

Or the time someone left a red sock in the washer and turned your load of whites Pepto-Bismal pink?

Or that Parent-Teacher Night when your child's teacher said with a knowing smile, "Oh, I've heard so much about you."

Did you laugh? Probably not.

Neither did I, but I wish I had.

How one woman found the better way

My long-ago friend, Marge, had an easy laugh and an unflappable spirit. Even her irrepressible young son's antics didn't faze her. 

I remember the rainy morning I dropped by for coffee and we sat around her kitchen table. "Jimmy" came running in, grabbed a towel and soon reappeared with their very wet family cat wrapped in the towel, then headed toward the laundry room.

Marge and I went on sipping and chatting.

A few minutes later we heard a lot of thumping and bumping coming from the direction of the laundry room. Marge jumped up and went to investigate. I followed, a few steps behind.

Six-year-old Jimmy stood in front of the gas clothes dryer with his arms folded across his chest and kept chanting, "There's no cat in here, Mommy, there's no cat in here. Honest!"

Marge barely managed to suppress her laughter--and so did I  

She shut off the dryer and rescued the cat, then sternly ordered Jimmy to his room. Once he was out of earshot, we collapsed into laughter.

After awhile Marge put down the still rather dazed Kitty and poured it a bowl of milk.  

After she refilled our coffee mugs I asked her secret to remaining calm no matter what. She thought a minute, then said, "I used to get easily upset, but I learned to ask myself, 'Will it matter in a hundred years?' If not I make myself laugh and simply deal with what is.

"I decided a long time ago that life is too short to waste it blowing up over trifles."

"Make myself laugh"

That day I discovered yes, it's a matter of our temperament, but it's also--and perhaps most of all--a matter of will.

Marge taught herself to find the laughter in everyday frustrations.

My friend role-modeled the woman, the kind of mom, I wanted to become, one who looked for--and found--at least a bit of joy in every situation. Now I understood why my mood improved whenever I spent time with her. 

A happy heart makes the face cheerful, but heartache crushes the spirit.   Proverbs 15:13

Laughter is catching, but so is the opposite 

Our attitudes show up most clearly at home. One happy spouse usually means two happy spouses. Parents who laugh a lot have children who laugh a lot.

Conversely, one family member's lousy mood can spread to the rest of the family than any 24-hour stomach bug. In no time at all everybody is cranky and complaining.

Few of us would answer the phone or show up at work with that attitude. Instead, we'd breathe deep and dredge up smiles. From somewhere.

Don't we owe the same to the ones we love?

Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.   Proverbs 12:18

The value of laughter for our health    

Counselors say the ability to laugh at ourselves is a major factor in keeping us emotionally balanced. Medical people tell us laughter also benefits our physical health and even revs up our immune system.

Since laughter is good for us, why do so many of us routinely choose to wear a frown or a sober expression?  

A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.   Proverbs 17:22

Let's get rid of that tired old habit

It will take some resolve to change, but we can do it. If we need more incentive, how about this? The experts tell us that smiling and laughing will pay off in fewer wrinkles because it takes 37 muscles to frown and only 12 to smile.

And wouldn't it brighten every day if we adopted a more relaxed attitude toward life and our individual situation?

It's obvious our Creator endowed human beings with the capacity to smile and laugh. Nobody ever has to teach a baby how to laugh.

You and I possess that same natural potential for finding humor in small things and everyday happenings. Let's cultivate that gift and let it add sparkle to our days.

I'm in. How about you? 

Learning along with you,

Lenore

Be sure you know the source of the labels you wear

Have you ever identified with a fable or an old folk tale and been surprised by a flash of insight into your life? I have. I think this might be one of those.    

The story goes that somehow an eagle's egg got mixed in with the chicken eggs in a nest.

The mama hen seemed not to notice. To her an egg was an egg. Period.

So she sat contentedly on her nest, waiting for THE day her eggs would hatch.  

Finally, the time was right. In short order the chicks pecked their shells open and emerged looking a bit wobbly and confused, as is the way of baby chicks.

So did the fluffy, newly hatched eaglet, who looked around at the only world he knew, the world of chickens. So he walked like a chicken and ate what his chicky siblings ate and minded his own chicky business. 

A grove of nearby trees towered into the skies and a pair of American eagles nested there. The growing eaglet often stopped scratching in the dirt to watch them come and go. He never tired of seeing those big birds circling overhead, their wide wings outstretched. Higher and higher they soared.

The eaglet thought, Oh, what it would be like to fly way up high like that? If only I could! But ... I could never fly like that, not me.  It's like Mama always tells me, "You're just a chicken, so don't even try. Just be happy as you are."

The young eagle tried, really he did, but he knew he didn't fit in, what with his long, gangly legs and that bulky body. He felt he didn't belong in that flock of chickens who spent their days scratching in the dirt. As Mama often said, that's what chickens do, so why wasn't that enough for him? 

That left only one possibility: It had to be his fault.

No wonder he often asked himself, What's wrong with me? Why can't I be like the others and be happy? 

After awhile the young eagle didn't even bother to look up. He gave up wishing for more and lived out his days with the chickens, never knowing he could fly.

What's more, he never even tried. Why bother? After all, his mama always told him he could not fly ....

Here's the point for you and me 

Even when we're unaware of it, we each carry around old labels and messages that still influence how we see ourselves today.

If you doubt that, take a mental inventory. Think back to what your parents or teachers--or siblings--told you about you. Which messages helped you? Which ones do you still try to erase from that nagging sound track in your mind?

See what I mean?

View those memories from a different angle

Find a time to unpack those old messages and look at them with your present perspective. Not many of us grew up with abusive parents or in an extremely dysfunctional family. That makes it likely your parents loved you--at least in their minds.

Why not be kind and assume that what they said to you and how they parented you probably was the best they knew how to do at the time?

Instead of looking for reasons why somebody said this or that, why not let it go?

With that shift in place, you can choose to consider such incidents--whether once in awhile or a pattern--as part of your past but irrelevant to the person you are today.

What if it still hurts and no one seems to care?

First ask yourself if it's possible such things could serve as some sort of comfort, as if with that in place you know who you are.

This may sound illogical, but chew on it for awhile.

Counselors report they spot that frequently. For example, children of alcoholics "see themselves" as powerless to avoid addiction to alcohol. Why? Because that's what they grew up with, so for them, it's "normal."

Substitute whatever dysfunction you may have grown up around and ask yourself if someplace deep inside, you consider that to be your "natural fate."

Then ask yourself what sense it makes to stay stuck in old, dead-end thinking. 

Start where you are and choose the better way  

Those remarks that do not now (and perhaps never did) fit you? Decide to let them go and not dwell on them in the future. As that gets easier, they gradually will fade away. 

Every time they resurface, don your "forgiveness filter" and substitute remembrances that make you smile.  

Now take a fresh look at the adult you are today. Think about your life and the good qualities you know are present within you. Write them down so you can refer to it when old doubts resurface.   

One thing more

Our children, whether our own or those we're around frequently, carry our words with them, too. For life.

News flash: Neither you nor I is perfect.

It's still good advice to "Think before you speak," even--or especially--with those we love.

Although we love our kids and do our best to parent wisely, inevitably, sometimes our words will sting and bother them, whether they're young or well into adulthood.  

Some of us have learned to first ask ourselves, "Will my words bless or burn, now and in the future?"

Good words

Frequently name the good qualities you see in those you love. Let them know you're proud of them. Praying for them. Ready to talk any time.  

Promise yourself that from now on your children will hear only words that bless them every time they recall what you said. Ask God to give you wisdom--and possibly, restraint--to do so.

Does this mean you never can voice an opinion? No. Having a solid foundation of love and mutual respect between you builds trust and loving openness. Just tread softly.

As always, the Bible points out the better way to live

Whether within your family or as an individual, here are three helps for all of us:    

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.  Ephesians 4:13

With all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love.  Ephesians 4:2

Above all, keep loving one another earnestly since love covers a multitude of sins.  1 Peter 4:8

In Jesus, in love, it's never too late to make a new start.  

From one still learning, here's to growing in love,

Lenore

Will the real meaning of Easter please stand up?

What an odd mixture of Easter symbols we have in America...and probably all over the world. Bunnies, butterflies, baby chicks, eggs, flowers and green grass, chocolates in foil wrappings.

And once in awhile, a picture of a man hanging on a wooden cross.

But hey, isn't Easter really all about Spring and everything greening up, blooming, growing?

No, not really.

The deeper meaning of Easter

Easter traces back to the life and death of a man called Jesus, who was impaled on a wooden cross on a hill outside Jerusalem.

Heavy nails had been pounded through his hands and his feet. Blood trickled down his face, the intended result from Roman soldiers twisting together some thorny branches to make a crown, then pressing it down on his head.

Blood seeped from the wounds on his back, too, the result of being mercilessly whipped by soldiers with leather whips that featured bits of bone and rock imbedded on the ends.  

Onlookers moaned and wept to see the suffering of this man.  

But the story doesn't end there

Jesus said little during the nine hours he spent on the cross. Near the end, he cried out in a loud voice, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?"  (Matthew 27:45)

Not long after, once again he called out in a loud voice, "Father, into your hands I commit my spirit."  (Luke 23:46)

At this point, for one who had been hanging on the cross for nine hours to be able to say anything in a loud voice was remarkable. A few breaths more and Jesus gave up his life as a human being.  

One of Jesus' followers found courage to ask permission to take down Jesus' body from the cross before sundown and Roman rulers permitted it. So Joseph of Arimathea, a member of the Jewish ruling council, took it down, then wrapped it in a linen shroud and laid him in a new tomb cut in stone. The women at the cross followed and saw where Jesus' body was laid. 

Then because sundown ushered in the Sabbath, they hurried home so they could observe it properly.    

The sad day Jesus died became known as "Good Friday," because it led up to Easter 

Early on Sunday morning followers of Jesus went to his grave, ready to embalm his body properly. They pondered how they could move the heavy stone Roman guards set in place to block the entrance, then sealed it around the edges with sealing wax. What's more, Pilate, the Roman ruler, had told the soldiers to stand guard, day and night.

They tried to think how they could manage those barriers.  

Matthew 28 tells us when Mary Magdalene and the other Mary arrived at the tomb there was a violent earthquake. An angel of the Lord came down from heaven and rolled back the stone, then sat on it. The Roman guards were so afraid of him that they shook and passed out.

When these grieving friends looked into the tomb they saw it was empty, with only the cloth death-wrappings left behind.

The angel said to the women, "Do not be afraid...He is not here; he has risen, just as he said...Go quickly and tell his disciples..."

What could this mean?                                

Who could know what it meant to "rise from the dead?" Every person alive, now or then, knows that dead means dead.

They hurried away from the tomb, headed for Galilee. Then suddenly (Matthew 28:9) Jesus himself stood before them and said, "Greetings."

Filled with joy, they clasped his feet and worshiped him. Jesus said, "Do not be afraid. Go and tell my brothers to go to Galilee; there they will see me."

They could not explain it, but Jesus did not stay dead. This was not a ghost, not a spirit, this truly was Jesus, their friend and teacher. 

Jesus, fully human, born of Mary, was--and is--true God, as well

Now his followers saw and touched the same loved friend they had watched die on the cross, very much alive and in the flesh. He spoke with them. He ate with them. How could this be?

Jesus told them again how much he loved them and promised they would receive power to carry on his ministry. How would this happen? Through the power of the Comforter, the Holy Spirit, which Jesus promised to send them. (And he did, just read the book of Acts and the rest of the New Testament.)

Even today, the same indwelling Holy Spirit lives within the hearts of everyone who believes what the Bible says and trusts in Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior.

Maybe you're reading this and thinking, "Says who? Why should I take your word for anything?"

Please don't. Check it out for yourself. Pick up a Bible and read the Gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John. (Don't miss John 3:16-17.) They all tell the story of Jesus and his life.

Each Gospel has a slightly different "flavor," since each was transcribed by a different individual. Matthew and Luke begin with his birth. Each one winds up with the sequence of events leading up to the crucifixion of Jesus Christ and his resurrection. 

It's worth reading the book of Romans, too, especially chapter 8, verses 1-4 and also verse 31 to the end of the chapter. 

How could one sum up the Easter story? John's Gospel, Chapter 3:16-17 lays it all out for us:

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.

Are you looking for a more modern explanation?

One I think says it well goes something like this: 

Jesus had to be true man, because God cannot die for the sins of the world. God cannot die for any reason. He is eternal, without beginning and without end.

Jesus had to be true God because man cannot forgive sins or pay the price of sin for the world. Only God.

So what's the big deal about Easter? Just this: New life for the world. New life for each of us--eternally--free for the taking. 

Look around. Every new leaf, every bud and bloom, points back to the Source of life that never ends: Jesus Christ. 

All it costs is taking Jesus at his word.

"I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full."  Romans 10:10.

Life. To the full. Now and eternally. For me, that's the real meaning of Easter, because Jesus' resurrection proved the truth of what he said about himself. Now, there's reason to celebrate!

May you know for yourself the peace and joy that Easter's real meaning brings,

Lenore 

Hear wisdom for America from a one-time Nazi youth leader

Reports from Ukraine and the surrounding countries keep us all on edge. Many of us are hazy about the long, troubled history of this part of the world and don't see the tie-ins between what's going on now and say, World War II. "Hansi's" story will fill in some of the gaps.

I met her when she spoke at a years-ago gathering of Christian women in our area. We knew only that our speaker had grown up under Hitler. As usual, I came prepared to take notes. 

 Maria Ann Hirschmann started off by saying, "Everyone calls me Hansi," and continued on in a lively stream of words.

Soon she announced that by God's mercy and protection she had reached the age of 84 years old. 

I think it's fair to say none of us expected to hang on every word she spoke, but we did. Nor could we know how her story would relate to anything here in the United States.

Hansi was born in Czechoslovakia to German-speaking parents, which made them part of a small minority. Times were harsh, with never enough food. When Hansi's mother realized she was pregnant with their third child, her husband insisted she have an abortion, a common "solution" for an unexpected pregnancy.

"But my mother believed in God," Hansi said, "and she could not do that."

When the infant turned out to be a third daughter, her father took one look and said, "Ach! Another girl," and walked away in disgust. 

Not long after, this Christian mother urged her best friend, "Marta," to take in Hansi, even though she already had four children. Marta felt her friend's distress and answered, "I will take your child and I will raise her for Jesus." 

"She kept her promise and I learned about the Christian faith," Hansi said, "but my foster mother stressed that God wants us to be good--and then He would love us. So I grew up believing God could never love me, because I was not an easy child. I always talked, always asked, 'Why?' and was forever in trouble. I felt unwanted at home and at school, but now even by God." 

Times were hard all over Czechoslovakia. The young girl grew up sleeping in haylofts and seldom had shoes, even in the coldest winter. Hunger stalked the land. "We had almost no food, no hope things could change and nothing to believe in.

"Then one day over the hill came the Nazi soldiers carrying the German flag.

"They told us not to be frightened. Hitler would take care of us. He would see to it that we had food and clothing and work, which meant money to spend. Within six weeks it all came true. We had enough to eat and at last we had shoes. Factories started up again, so we had jobs.

"Surely, we concluded, all this came about because of the goodness and wisdom of Adolph Hitler. So now we had someone we could put our faith in--and we did, because we saw the change all around us. Now we could dare to hope again."

Nazis went throughout the country testing children, even in the little one-room school Hansi attended. They chose her to attend the Youth Training Institute in Prague. "For the first time somebody actually chose me. I was the poorest kid in the village, so I could not expect to go on to high school or college," Hansi said. "Now I thought I had caught the rainbow.

"As I got on the train my foster mother whispered in my ear, 'Don't forget about Jesus.' I promised I wouldn't, but within a year I had totally forgotten everything I ever learned about Jesus."

For the first time in her life Hansi had a bed of her own, with warm blankets, in a warm room. She had new clothes (her uniforms) with three good meals every day. Leaders constantly told these young people. "The 'Great Supreme Being' has chosen Hitler to save Germany and all of Europe. And Adolph Hitler has chosen each of you to be a leader, to help him change the world."

"At last I had a purpose," she said. "Folks always ask me how the people of the Reformation could believe in Hitler and allow Nazism to take over their land. I tell them we were brainwashed, which is nothing more than being told the same thing over and over and over.

"We didn't know the word 'brainwashing,' didn't even guess it was happening, but it was. After awhile, you think it must be right, because you keep hearing it everywhere. We all believed what we heard and millions turned away from God.

"I know now that all this proves the truth of Proverbs 14:12, which reads, "There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death."

Her present fear for the USA

"My friends," Hansi told us on that California Saturday, "that is my biggest fear for my beloved America. I am very, very afraid for our country. As a nation we have turned to the ways of the world and it seems right. In so many ways we have abandoned the God of our forefathers.

"I know from personal experience that when you turn away from God a country can be destroyed very quickly.

"That's why I say to you and all my fellow Americans, in every election, Vote! Learn all you can about the candidates and choose carefully, but vote! If two people are running and you don't like either one, then vote for the lesser of two evils. But don't ever forget that being allowed to vote is a tremendous privilege and freedom is never something to take for granted.

"Freedom is God's gift and it is precious. I know, because I have lived without it." 

In my next post I'll tell you about Hansi's dangerous escape from Russian captivity and her first frightening encounter with a dreaded American.

(Please note: This is my best paraphrase of Hansi's words, from my notes and also watched the five-part YouTube series about Maria Anne Hirschmann, a.k.a., Hansi.)

May God bless you and watch over you,

Lenore