Have you ever sunk into feeling sorry for yourself?
I confess to being, um, a little bit familiar with that unfortunate state of mind.
Like the time my husband got transferred in his work. He had studied and worked hard, hoping a move up would come through--and it did. He couldn't stop smiling.
I was happy for him, truly I was, but I couldn't quite share his exhilaration. I grieved inwardly about leaving our friends and the community I loved.
My sweet husband? "Yes, but Honey, you know I can start right in and you read the contract. We'll be okay."
Logic told me he was right, but logic didn't change my heart. Yet I absolutely knew God arranged this position for my husband, so ...
I kept reminding myself surely He would have something good waiting for me, too.
But what? Where?
Once the moving truck unloaded our stuff in our new home, well, you know the routine.
Right away my husband had a "place" in our new community. He packed his days with appointments and meeting new people. I kept busy unpacking boxes and finding a place for this and for that. At last it felt more like our home, at least inside our four walls.
Every day I pored over the local newspaper, trying to get a fix on the place we were living. One day I noticed a small listing for a community non-denominational women's Bible study. What did I have to lose?
The next day I grabbed my Bible and drove to the host church. To my surprise and delight, parked cars stretched for blocks in all directions.
Near the closing time all our small groups gathered in the auditorium so the teaching leader could expound on our assigned lesson from the Bible book of Exodus. She vividly recounted the story of God freeing the Israelites from captivity in Egypt.
That day the familiar story from Sunday School sounded brand-new to my heart.
The marvel of God's power
You may remember how God set the children of Israel free from slavery in Egypt. Soldiers in chariots came after them all the way to the Red Sea, but before they got there, God parted the waters so His people could walk on dry land across the seabed.
Once the Israelites were safely across, God released the waters. The pursuing Egyptians, along with their horses and chariots, were lost.
Now God's people were free, but all they saw around them was dry desert and wilderness, but God did not abandon His people. He provided Manna every morning and flocks of quail every twilight, plus pure water.
And yet the people grumbled.
Exodus 16 tells us they looked back fondly to Egypt--and slavery--because they liked the food better.
The truth that hit home
In her talk our study leader kept looking around the room to be sure we all felt included. Then came her concluding applications. It seemed she looked right at me when she asked, "Are you wandering around in a dry, dusty wilderness of your own making?"
I gulped. Then she asked, "Are you murmuring against God because the specifications of your life are not exactly as you would choose?"
She couldn't have known, but her words described exactly how I felt about our new life, the one God had given us.
That day nothing changed, but everything changed.
Once I took my eyes off Poor Pitiful Me and looked for the good in our new situation I found quite a lot.
My husband said he got his wife back--and here I thought he hadn't noticed.
I've never forgotten that lesson: Look for the good, whatever the situation
Recently I ran across an old prayer I've loved for years, ever since I happened on it in a souvenir shop.
The original was found folded and tattered in the pocket of an unknown Confederate soldier, a casualty in the U.S. Civil War, 1865:
I asked God for strength, that I might achieve;
I was made weak, that I might learn humbly to obey.
I asked for health, that I might do greater things;
I was given infirmity, that I might do better things.
I asked for riches, that I might be happy;
I was given poverty, that I might be wise.
I asked for power, that I might have the praise of men;
I was given weakness, that I might feel the need of God.
I asked for all things, that I might enjoy life;
I was given life, that I might enjoy all things.
I got nothing that I asked for, but everything I hoped for.
I am among all men most richly blessed.
Those simple, eloquent words still touch my heart every time I read them because they remind me of all the times I, too, got "nothing that I asked for, but everything I hoped for."
I wish I could say I never lost sight of that truth, but one thing I know for sure. When I focus on the Giver's goodness it's much easier to keep a sunny mood.
My friend, I pray that you find many blessings in each day!
Lenore
