A WOMAN'S VIEW ~ Lenore Buth

Will Christmas cards and letters go the way of the dodo bird?

I wish I could say I mailed off the last Christmas letter today.

Notice, "I wish I could say ... "

Not yet.

I love Christmas cards and letters in any form at all. Hearing from friends and loved ones is one of my favorite things about Christmas.

Are they worth the effort?

I remember...

For many years of my life I lived in the Midwest, in the middle of farming country. 

No computers or Internet back then and all telephones were land-line. Few people made long-distance calls that went over the 3-minute limit. Too expensive. 

But then and now, country folks had R.F.D., Rural Free Delivery of the mail.

Rural mail carriers are tough. They drive long daily routes and deliver mail to every house along their appointed route, almost no matter what the weather. 

No wonder our "mailman" was our hero

As a child I watched for ours with daily anticipation. After all, he might bring us something exciting from the outside world! 

Like letters. Magazines. The daily newspaper. 

Twice a year my hero brought big fat catalogs from Sears. And Montgomery Ward. And Spiegel.

In cold December he delivered patches of warm sunlight disguised as Christmas cards and letters.

Every day I saw and heard the worth of Christmas greetings. I watched my parents as they read every Christmas letter sometimes with laughter, sometimes with tears. Then one would ask the other, "Remember when ... ?" and retell old stories.

As a little girl it seemed magical that people we hadn't seen for years at once felt close again.

A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.  Prov. 17:17

Light in the winter darkness

As an Illinois farm wife I lived miles away from my family. Years later my husband I moved our family far from our Midwestern roots. After that came several job-related moves on the West Coast. 

No matter. 

Wherever we've lived, when we pick up our December mail and find Christmas cards and letters, I think exactly what I thought as a child: They haven't forgotten us. We still matter to them. This person loves me/us.

I love what C. S. Lewis said:

“Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art… It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival.”  

In a world that sometimes feels cold and impersonal, simple Christmas greetings bring warmth and joy

Both the frenzy of sending and the joy of receiving remind us again that people matter more than anything. 

Just a simple note can bring joy. A line or two, perhaps, "Thinking of you and sending you love and blessings," is enough.

So I make no apologies.  I crave that heart-to-heart communication across the miles, whether it arrives in a stamped envelope or as an E-mail.

And I'll bet you do, too. (Aren't we all the same under the skin?)

My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.  --John 15:12

And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them.  --Luke 6:31

It's never too late to start again

With red face I admit if I were an airline I'd be out of business. This last year or so almost every greeting I've sent arrived late. It's time I reprogram my software.

So I'm gearing up to send good old hold-in-your-hand Christmas greetings to convey what's in my heart.

In an age of technology that sounds old-fashioned, but who knows? Maybe I'm on the cutting edge.

Sometimes they look a lot alike.

Question: How about you? Please, tell us how you communicate love and joy at Christmas.

Merry getting-ready-for-Christmas, 

Lenore

 

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Give yourself a gift--hang onto those friendships!

I don't know who said these words first:

A friend is a present you give yourself.

Last night my husband and I felt very gifted. We spent the evening with a group of friends we've known for more than twenty years.           

Have you ever been in a gathering of friends or family and listened to the music of their laughter and joking, with everyone speaking at once?

How sweet it was!

Yet friendships so easily slip away. They get buried under the stack of To Dos that didn't get done and the absolutely urgent Must Do stuff.

That's life, as they say. But it's a shame.

Sometime in the hazy past a teacher made us memorize a rhyme, probably one of those times when one best friend wasn't speaking to another. It went something like this:

Make new friendships, but keep the old;

One is silver, the other gold.

For all of us, wherever we live, we leave parts of ourselves behind. We take memories with us, plus the friendships that mattered while we were there. The trouble is, to keep those relationships alive we need to put a bit of effort and nurturing into them, or they wither away.

Since most of us live busy lives, that takes effort...and who has time? Small personal touches help. (I'll be the first to admit I don't do this enough and I've probably paved several miles of that road to hell with my good intentions.) 

What to do? The bottom line is that it's always good to hear from people we love. If you're like me that may mean your main contact with people who live a distance from you is sending out Christmas cards that include your (copied) letter. Then add a short handwritten line or two that's personal. That's not enough, of course, but it beats sending what feels to the recipient like a form letter.

Is it worth it? YES! Last night provided fresh proof that friendships endure over time. We've found you can be separated by distance, but still close in heart.

It feels soooo good to re-connect, rather like one of those plants that come to life in a warm spring rain.

So do yourself a favor. Get in touch with those friends you haven't heard from, maybe haven't called or written for too long. Don't worry about feeling or sounding awkward because it's been awhile.

Make the effort. Call. Write. Send a card.

Don't do it for them. Do it for you. Keep at it, even if you don't hear back for awhile. Keep that thread flowing. One day you'll meet again and pick up where you left off.

Perhaps nothing feels so satisfying as connecting with true and trusted friends, the kind of folks with whom you can be completely yourself and at ease. Afterward, you'll smile for a very long time. I know, because that's what my husband and I have been doing ever since.

Maybe you're missing friends like that right now. Why not call or write or e-mail that person? You'll be glad you did!

And I promise you'll wonder why you waited so long.

Blessings,

Lenore

Question for you: How do you make friends? How do you keep those friendships going? Tell us how you do it, please. Your comments welcomed!

Blessings,

Lenore