A WOMAN'S VIEW ~ Lenore Buth

Forget the old definitions: There are no small jobs

Remember when we were little and we proudly declared, "I'm gonna do something important when I grow up!"

Most of us lost that certainty and we toned it down as the years went by. Besides, our definition of "important" changed--and that's a good thing.

Some people have a mental pecking order when it comes to jobs. Sorry to tell you, but that's an outdated concept.  

Sometimes a job is much more than it seems 

Mitzi works in a child care center. She earns little more than minimum wage, but she loves kids.

Some days the babies cry all day and toddlers cling. On those days sometimes she would like to turn around, walk out the door and never come back.

But she stays, knowing she's "security" for the little ones in her charge. 

The moms and dads love her because it's plain to see that Mitzi loves their children. They often confide in her because she always lets them talk. What's more, she takes time to listen. Mitzi raised three children of her own, so she often passes on practical tips from her own parenting.  

More than one young mom has said to her, "I don't know what I'd do without you, Mitzi. I'm just flying by the seat of my pants as a mom and I don't have anyone else to ask. You are a lifesaver!"

George is "just a janitor" in a middle school.

He has a small cubbyhole "office" where he eats his sack lunch and puts his feet up between chores.

Each year at the beginning of the school year he makes sure to spread the word to students just coming in that he wants to be helpful. He lets everyone know it's okay to stop by his office and if he can help them, he will.  

There might as well be a sign that reads "Counselor" over the door to his tiny room. Every day one or a few kids stop by. They talk and he listens. Sometimes he asks leading questions that turn their thoughts in a new direction. He takes the time, even if they still hang around after the end of a long school day.  

Always, George takes care that his door stays open. 

When a student finishes talking it out George usually assures them that he can tell they are strong and that he knows they will work it out. Most of the time that's all they need.

Sometimes he advises them to talk to a particular teacher or counselor. If he spots a youngster who seems deeply troubled, he quietly alerts faculty members who could come alongside.

Every now and then a kid will tell him, "You're my best friend in all the world, George. Nobody else cares."

Sandy worked behind the counter of a roller skating rink

On weekends and vacation times that rink also served as a hangout for middle- and high-schoolers with too much time on their hands. Her official job was to check everyone in and hand out skates.

Sandy didn't stop with that. She also settled arguments, usually by listening to both sides and then helping the kids get a better perspective. Her clear eyes saw everything, including young couples who couldn't keep their hands off each other.

"They're good kids, most of 'em," she said, "but a few have no one at home because their parents work late. That's why they hang around here--and why they talk to me. Some of their questions are 'lulus,' let me tell you! Everything from faith to sex to fear their parents might be getting a divorce."

That's when Sandy smiled, her face alight with real affection. "They need someone they can talk to. That makes me glad I can be here and that I have time to listen. I give out lots of hugs and I get hugged back. I guess for some of those kids I'm like another mom--and it's good for me to be needed, too."

Let's drop the word "just" when talking about what we do

You're not "just" a mom or a dad. You are raising the next generation. What could be more important than that? You are the one(s) in charge of your family's life and almost certainly, you set the tone for the atmosphere in your home.

You're not "just" a senior with time on your hands. You can use that extra time in so many ways, with your family, in your church and/or in your community. You are available and that enables you to be a blessing in ways that weren't possible earlier in your life.

You're not "just" a caregiver for a loved one. You are the one who--probably more than you know--makes it possible for that family member to feel still loved and valued, in spite of needing care.

You're not "just" a nurse or nurse's aide. You are the one who has the most direct contact with patients. You care for them--and probably with a smile that doesn't quit. You speak hope when they are depressed and encourage them.  

You're not "just" the employee who keeps the business or restaurant tidy, including the restrooms. Because of your quiet work in the background, customers relax and feel confidence that things are done as they should be. 

The list goes on and on. Endlessly.

Adding value to what we do as individuals

However we spend our days we can make life better for ourselves and others without much extra effort, often with words alone. 

It's as the writer of Proverbs says in 25:11 (ESV):

A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver.  

A friend suggested the other day that instead of the cliche, "Have a nice day," we Christians easily could say, "May God give you a good day."

Or when someone asks, "How are you?" we could do better than reply with our standard "I'm fine." We could answer with something like, "I'm blessed and thankful, and I hope you are, too."

Suppose we took the words of the Apostle Paul seriously

Finally, brothers [and sisters,] whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.   Philippians 4:8  ESV

What if you and I made it our "job" to live out those words? Whatever else we do each day, we could embody these truths and let it come through in our ordinary conversations and our everyday responsibilities. Think how that could change our days--and every interaction with other people.

This may sound small and unimportant, but trust me: The results(s) could be mighty.

Best of all, whatever our age or life situation, every one of can do this "small job, right now, wherever we are. 

Ready, set, go!

Lenore

 

In praise of all the "little people"who make the world a better place

Have you ever known someone who never seemed to rate much attention even though they deserved it?

I heard about a woman like that, let's call her Martha. She lived in a tiny town far away from any city of size and belonged to a very small church that struggled to stay alive.  

Martha never taught Sunday School or Bible class. She never sang in the choir. When asked, she offered her standard reply: "Thanks for asking me, but when the good Lord was passing out gifts, he passed right over me. Believe me, you don't want me to try teaching! And ask anyone who sits next to me in church, I can't carry a tune. I'm a follower, not a leader and I like it that way."  

She never missed a worship service or a church event and at potlucks, people gobbled up her tasty dishes. Yet Martha would be out in the kitchen, washing dishes and wiping counters and sweeping the floor.   

That's probably why people knew her face, but couldn't remember her name.

Hardly anyone noticed when Martha moved away

A few weeks later the grumbling started. The Sunday "coffee guy" said, "This place is falling apart! I came to put the coffee on, like always, and there's no coffee to put in the coffeemaker. Whose job is it to buy the extra supplies?" 

A flustered woman said, "We have an urgent need and I can't find any toilet paper or paper towels in the supply cabinet! This never happened before."

One of those who overheard said, "And whoever is supposed to sweep the sidewalks is falling down on the job! What's going on around here?"

You're way ahead of me, aren't you?

Martha, the I-have-no-gifts-or-talents lady, always took care of those things. Quietly, on her own.

She lived close to the church, which allowed her to do her work at times when the pastor would be studying in his office. Hardly anyone ever noticed. When he heard the complaints he made it known how this quiet woman faithfully ministered to everyone else--not for applause, but out of love.

Perhaps you're a little--or a lot--like Martha. You go around blessing the people around you and never look for praise.

Maybe you think you have no "place"--or if you do, it's way at the bottom of the pecking order 

If that's where you are, here's a short poem for all of us, no matter what we do each day:

YOUR PLACE

Is your place a small place?

Tend it with care!--

He set you there.

Is your place a large place?

Guard it with care!

He set you there.

Whate'er your place, it is

Not yours alone, but His

Who set you there.

--John Oxenham            

Whatever we do, wherever we are in life, it's not by chance

We all feel like "little people" from time to time. That doesn't matter unless we brood over it and think we should receive more recognition. What our Lord thinks of us is what matters because he knows our hearts and our motives.

Here's a much-loved Bible verse to hang onto in every situation:

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you."

--Jeremiah 29:11-12           

Still growing,

Lenore

 

Tell your kids the facts about life in the real world

This time of year most older high-schoolers--and their parents--are tied up in knots about what comes next.

Everyone wants to make the absolutely right choice.

College graduates are tense, too, looking for the absolutely perfect job.

That could be a long wait.

Recent graduates often feel dumped out in a world that's nothing like the dream they bought with their student loans. Some resign themselves to any job they can get that includes a regular paycheck. Others keep chasing their ideal.

Life is hard. How many of us tell our kids that beforehand?

1. Tell your kids the truth

One columnist noted that today's graduates grew up with parents who continually asked, "How does that make you feel, Honey?"

No wonder the world of employment offers a rude shock. Bosses seldom ask, "How do you feel about that?"

Employers want employees to show up on time, stay until quitting time and get the job done well and on schedule. They concentrate on the bottom line because unless their business turns a profit, there's no money to stay in business.

Or issue paychecks.

We do our kids no favor when we groom them to expect life should feel cozy and warm, like a mommy's hug.

2. Be a true friend to your children

A good friend speaks truth, even when we don't want to hear it. Our children deserve the same from us.

Sooner or later, most of us learn the no-nonsense foundation for success along the way. In school, in the job world, or even in our personal lives, here's the formula:

W-O-R-K.

Sounds hopelessly outdated, doesn't it?

That's especially true after hearing commencement speakers--and parents--who so often tell young people, "Follow your bliss! Live for your dreams! Refuse to settle for less than what makes you happy!"

Then someone will bring up Facebook founder, Mark Zuckerberg, who became a billionaire at age twenty-seven.

Reality check: How many Mark Zuckerbergs do you know personally?

3. Plant good seeds, so your kids can harvest good fruit

Love your children enough to speak lasting truth. Even in a dream job, they will have to prove themselves.

Most employees start at the bottom. It will be a slow climb from there.

They will not like parts of it. Guaranteed. Life is hard, remember? This is what hard looks like.

A runner talked of training for a track meet. "Runners know you must keep your eyes on your goal. If you waver and look down at the track your energy goes to what's under your feet and you'll lose the race."

To build a strong career, marriage or family we can't allow small annoyances to get us down. We need to fasten on what's good and let the other stuff go.

4. Nail it home that a good life does not depend on having every dream come true

Give your children a lasting gift. Tell them nobody has everything they want or everything as they want it to be. 

Help them understand that individuals who expect that or insist upon it set themselves up for lasting discontent.

Wealth and achievements can never fill our inner emptiness because there will never be enough of either.

Happiness and satisfaction stem from how we look at life and from thanking God for our blessings.

A grateful spirit is a contented spirit.

5. Remember to pass on eternal truths

Be sure your children learn about Jesus Christ, our Savior. Worship together as a family and cultivate friendships with other Christian families.  

Faith is the real key to a fulfilling life and peace within.

The LORD gives strength to his people; the LORD blesses his people with peace.  --Psalm 29:11

Jesus said:

"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."    --Matthew 6:33

Life in the real world is unpredictable and the only solid Rock is Jesus.

What we're talking about is helping our kids take on life without life getting the best of them. We moms and dads do that all along, little by little as we encourage them to keep trying and try again and to keep going. And we dole out love and hugs every chance we get.

Parenting is a process that goes on as long as we live, even though it changes form over the years. 

Call it what it is: Privilege. Blessing. Joy. 

Thanking God, too, 

Lenore

Could you be packed and ready to fly to Acapulco tomorrow?

I don't know about you, but I'm longing for lazy time in the sun, looking out at a deep blue ocean, with palm trees and endless sun...

Some place like Acapulco, for instance. 

I hadn't thought much about Acapulco before the January day I heard a convention speaker describe it in Chamber-of-Commerce terms.

All I knew about him was his name: Zig Ziglar. 

Once he took the podium he spun some country stories, his southern accent coming through. the stories never stopped.  

After awhile he looked out over his audience, smiling and with his eyes twinkling and asked: 

"How many of you think you're overworked and too stressed to take time off to relax?"

Most of us in that large auditorium raised our hands.

"Well, how about a package deal that includes two round-trip plane tickets, plus vouchers for a week at a plush oceanside resort, all meals and tips included.

"Now, I know you're overworked and too stressed to take time off to relax . . . (He grinned and paused for what seemed a long time.) "But how many of you think you could be at the airport, checked in and ready to fly to Acapulco by 2 o'clock tomorrow afternoon? Raise your hands, please."  

Laughter. Cheers. Everyone waving their raised hands.  

Zig waited for us to quiet down

Then he said in a soft voice, "Well, if you could have been packed and ready to go to Acapulco by tomorrow at 2, why can't you manage to take a weekend off with your spouse or your whole family?

"I'll bet there's a nice motel with an indoor swimming pool not too far from where you live. 

"The point is  each of us somehow manages to do what we really think is important to do. 

"And nothing is more important than your marriage and your family!

"Don't put the people you love last on your To Do list! When your personal life is happy you'll be more productive in every other area of your life--and less stressed, too."

Are you feeling stressed and overworked? 

All of us wonder sometimes How will I make it through the day?

It's true for moms. And dads. For the married and the single. For old and young. For people who struggle from paycheck to paycheck and for those who don't.  

Even if we're well-adjusted.

Even when we're happily married and love our children to pieces.

Even though we're strong Christians. 

Sometimes, for no particular reason, life simply feels overwhelming.

Times like that we dream of escape--to Acapulco, or any place, really, where we can be calm and quiet, with time to think and no pressure.

But we stay

We stay because we love our spouse and our children.

We stay because we have something to do that matters.

We stay because we know deep down we're right where we need to be.

And because it's the way to peace in our hearts.

So we take a deep breath and ask God to renew our strength and our joy--and maybe our love.

And we remember again what the writer of Ecclesiastes said in chapter 4:6:

Better one handful with tranquillity than two handfuls with toil and chasing after the wind.    --Ecclesiastes 4:6  (NIV)

Besides . . . 

A happy heart makes the face cheerful, but heartache crushes the spirit.    -- Proverbs 15:13  (NIV)

Even in Acapulco. 

 

Growing, too,

Lenore